You know... for being only 6* this morning... I think because there wasn't any wind... it was rather nice out. The drive to school was slow and careful.... but fun to watch the snow fly at the windshield. The snow fall was a big reminder to me this morning that GOD is in control... control of ALL! This week... I have been a bit of a frustrated child stomping her feet because she didn't get her way.... I'm frustrated because although Michael's protein levels are High... the edema has shown itself....he has aches and pains and the doctors say he is in relapse.... I know without a doubt in my head or my heart that he is healed... all these signs and tests are tricks and lies from Satan. I know God has healed Michael. So some of my frustration is ... I know many will look at me as if I have lost my mind... and why has God left me only the one feeling this way? I mean... Praise God... He has given us doctors and medicines to help .... I am so thankful for the 10 extra years I got with my daddy because of doctors... their knowledge and medicines. But for some reason... this is so different for me. I totally trust that God has healed Michael. And if Michael is healed... why has God not stopped us from starting Michael on prednizone? Why did God not show everyone else Michael is fine through the blood tests last week? Am I crazy? Is my heart so full of WANT for Michael to be healed I have convinced myself it to be true? Was I suppose to insist on my feelings before hand and didnt? All this lead me to researching about being frustrated with God.... or being down right angry at Him. Maybe some of you are more than just frustrated and confused.
Have you ever shaken your fist at God over His answer to your prayers, or lack of answers?Have you grown angry with Him over the injustices in your life? If so, you’ll probably be able to know where the prophet Habakkuk was coming from. Gosh.. he lived roughly 600 years before Christ..... right? His book of the Bible starts right off with this complaint: “How long, O Lord, must I call for help, but you do not listen? Or cry out to you, “Violence!” but you do not save me. Why do you make me look at injustice? Why do you tolerate wrong?” (Hab.1:2-3). God answered Habakkuk by telling him to be patient and to watch..... that He will do amazing things and bring in justice....but only in His timing.
Passionate....honest.....gut-level....even angry prayers have been recorded through out the Bible. Habakkuk wasn’t the only one to complain. Moses....Gideon...and Elijah all questioned God. Job even cursed the day God made him and said, “I loathe my very life; therefore I will give free rein to my complaint and speak out in the bitterness of my soul. I will say to God, ‘Do not condemn me, but tell me what charges you have against me. Does it please you to oppress me, to spurn the work of your hands...?’” (Job 10:1-3). In his anguish, Job accused God of afflicting people for no reason (Job 9:17), overwhelming them with misery (Job 9:18), not caring about injustice (Job 9:22, 24), and laughing at the pain of the innocent (Job 9:22).
Of course these accusations are not the case.... but it is true that is how we often feel in times of severe suffering or testing. God knows our deepest thoughts and feelings, so it’s nonsense to think we can hide them from Him. Better to come clean with how we really feel, get it off our chest in prayer, and hopefully clear the way to hear and receive God’s reply or comfort. I’ve complained to God in the past for allowing my loved ones to die or fall deep into sin, for allowing things to be taken from me, for allowing my reputation to be unfairly tarnished, for allowing physical suffering in my body, or for not allowing what I felt I deserved. I have found the best thing I can do is honestly take these feelings to God where they can be traded for His perspective and His comforting assurance. Though God may not always change my circumstances the way I want Him to, He can and does change my perspective on those circumstances and enables me to endure them. God listens when we complain about injustice. He hates seeing the unrighteous prosper, mostly when it’s at the hands of the innocent, as much as we do. He understands when we feel shortchanged or opposed. Read through the gospel accounts of Jesus’ life and you’ll be see just how much Jesus can relate to undeserved opposition. Be honest before God in prayer today. While holding a degree of holy respect for Him and thankfulness for His saving grace, pour out the good, the bad and the ugly of your feelings. Just like Habakkuk, Job and others discovered, God can handle your intense emotions and questions. Though He rarely explains Himself fully to us – perhaps because we can’t fully understand this side of eternity – He does flood us with His power, love and peace when we come humbly and honestly before Him and pour out our heart.
Man is my heart full too............... guess I need to start getting things off my chest.
Dear Lord, it’s hard for me to understand Your ways. It’s hard for me to overlook offenses. It’s hard for me to deal graciously with the difficult situations or people in my life, and sometimes I grow more frustrated with You for allowing them into my life. But I don’t want to be a bitter or miserable person. I dont want to be upset with you or anyone. I want to do as you command... Love you with all my heart .... my soul and my mind ...and to love my neighbors as I do myself. Help me to see through Your eyes, and to endure all that You allow into my life, with Your grace. In Jesus’ Name, Amen
Well........... with that said........... its time for a little show and share. I had participated in a Secret Santa swap... and this is what my Secret Santa Partner sent me.......... Isnt she beautiful? I just love her! I couldnt have gotten anything better! Thank you Sissie... from the bottom of my heart................ She's perfect!
Okay kids.... you know the routine............ I'm off to get some crocheting done before I have to trudge the snow to get my babies from school.
You all have a GREAT day!
hugs... love and blessings,
**“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.” Philippians 4:6 **